"Sustainability means that resources are finite and should be used conservatively and wisely with a view to long-term priorities and consequences of the ways in which resources are used.” The more I read this statement, the more it makes me feel like sustainability is more about the mindset of the individual or the society rather than the use of resources itself.
Most of us find it challenging to implement sustainable living in an urban lifestyle. I feel this is because urban environments have an effect of overstimulating our senses. Overstimulation causes agitation in our body and minds causing us to do or say things that cause further agitation, a vicious cycle of negative impact of the environment on our behaviour and the consequence of the behaviour causing further damage to our environment!
The best example would be a simple hair colour advertisement that talks about silky, shiny, thick black hair boosting our image and self-confidence. We go to a hairdresser for a haircut, she comments on how much we have greyed since the last time we visited. We instantly feel a sense of low self-worth, thanks to the messaging of the advertisement. We end up spending a fortune on not only the hair colour but additional requirements like the shampoo, conditioners, the right kind of combing and drying equipment. After all this effort our hair goes back to being grey in a month and every time, we look at those greys in the mirror we feel inadequate!
The over stimulation caused by the advertisement and the constant need to look presentable cost us our peace of mind. The mind operated from a space of lack leading to an economic (the fortune we recurringly spend on the haircare products), environmental (the process of making these products, the plastic packaging, and the ground water contamination due to the chemicals) and health damages (the long-term consequences of using these chemicals).
In an urban setting, this sort of overstimulation makes us respond to every situation from a place of lack, fear, and a never-ending chase of the next best thing leading us to believe that sustainable living is impossible!
While the environment can influence our behaviours, we seem to have the intrinsic ability to stay detached from it. Going back to the example, what if we were able to bring ourselves to the consciousness that greying is a natural process and it is absolutely alright to flaunt greys? The consciousness and acceptance would have slowed the pace of our thoughts down which may have made us nonresponsive to the overstimulation and think more clearly about what we really need!
Our choices, irrespective of who we are, where we live, what we do can be sustainable when they are made consciously without the influence of external factors involving the need to keep up appearances or internal factors like fear (judgement, uncertainty, change) and sense of lack due to self-doubt can be sustainable!
Like for us, environments can be overstimulating for children as well! It could be bright lights, loud noises, screen time, toys, overprotective caregivers or lack of safety, agitated environments, stressed out caregivers, caregivers who find it difficult to set healthy boundaries and the like.
Sustainability in parenting means understanding parents are a finite resource in terms of patience, time, finances, abilities and of course our lifetime. As parents our long-term priorities are:
To develop a deep connection and trust with our children.
To facilitate them to grow into healthy, self-sufficient, and balanced individuals.
Creating overstimulating and indulgent environments for children, leaves them excessively dependent or demanding leaving us hanging on to our sanity by a thin thread – a damaging situation for both parents and children!
When AJ was born, I set out to manage everything on my own. Motherhood wasn’t like any of the earlier situations I faced earlier, it has been by far the most mentally, emotionally, and physically challenging situations. I was stressed all the time. The cascading effect of this was visible on my close relationships and my interactions with AJ. After some unpleasant instances and a lot of reflection it occurred to me that the root cause of the stress is because I could not ask for help. For me asking for help meant bothering another person and a show of my incapability. This created an unsustainable course of actions of managing everything myself and disrupting the environment for us as a family. I have since worked on myself to understand asking for help means neither of those! It means to be vulnerable and real, which is the only way we connect as human beings. A simple shift in my mindset created a significant shift in the way I have grown as an individual since, my relationships, the environment round AJ and most importantly the way I spend time with AJ.
A sustainable mindset is one we may want to incorporate in a child’s learning and experiential journey as:
Children will grow up to understand and accept themselves for who they are, the key to a balanced individual.
Children growing up amidst sustainable living practices develop self-reliance, resilience, and empathy as they grow up understanding healthy limitation and constraints.
Sustainability become second nature to the future generation, an aspect incorporated in their everyday lives along with minimalism.
Sustainable living develops creative ability in children as limited resources mean that there is a need to reduce, reuse, repair, repurpose, recycle everything they have.
Nature, my dear friends is the best teacher, healer, nurturer, and creator. Sustainable living is the only way we can preserve her and her abundant wisdom for generations to come.
Do you want to create a more sustainable environment? Do you feel any of your parenting habits are unsustainable? If yes, create a simple plan to bring in slow and steady changes towards sustainability. If you need help doing this DM us!
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